Starting When You Don’t Have All the Answers

By Christine Murray

Wouldn't it be nice if we had a crystal ball that gave us all the answers to alleviate any feelings of fear or uncertainty when starting a new chapter in life, relationships, or work? Oftentimes, when we're beginning a new phase, we can get overwhelmed by the uncertainties and the things we wish we knew but don't.

It's natural to feel scared when we don't have all the answers as we step into something new. In reality, it's more common not to have all the answers than it is to have enough information to feel completely assured, stable, and certain as we take those next steps forward.

Anyone who knows me knows that I am a planner. I love to create detailed plans based on facts, figures, and information. This summer, I had the opportunity to take a few exciting trips with my family. Leading up to those trips, I spent a lot of time googling things to do at our destination, what to pack, information about our accommodations, and details about local activities and customs.

All the information I gathered was so helpful. It made me feel as prepared as possible, especially going into new or unknown situations. It helped us plan, pack, and map out our schedule for each day to make the most of our adventures and opportunities.

Planning is great, but even in the best of circumstances, there are always unknowns. For example, I might know what time my transportation is supposed to pick me up, but what if it's late? I might know what to pack, but what if something unexpected happens? What if we arrived at our hotel and the room we reserved wasn't available?

Having answers, information, and advanced plans can be reassuring, but life's uncertainties and unpredictability still pop up. Even when we can do some planning, we often have to be prepared for the unexpected and acknowledge that there will be surprises along the way.

Starting new chapters and making big life changes is the same. Sometimes, realizing how much we don't know can prevent us from taking a leap. For instance, if you're unhappy at work and want to explore a different career path, the uncertainty of how it will feel, what steps to take, and how successful you might be can make staying in an uncomfortable situation seem safer. The comfort of familiarity can outweigh the risk and fear of moving forward with partial information.

Embracing uncertainty and unanswered questions as natural parts of making life changes can help us move into these experiences with a positive and balanced perspective. Expecting uncertainty and preparing to navigate it helps us feel confident moving ahead into the changes we want to see in life, even if we don't know exactly how things will turn out.

If we can truly embrace this uncertainty and the adventure it brings, we can make the most of opportunities for growth, development, and even our enjoyment of life. Think about it: If you knew exactly how every moment of every day, week, and step on your journey would go, it might feel comfortable and predictable, but also kind of boring, wouldn't it?

Surprises in life can be difficult and scary. Some of them do turn out badly and lead to outcomes we're not happy about. Yet, at the same time, unexpected developments, opportunities, pathways, and even life lessons from challenging experiences add to the beauty of fully experiencing our lives.

When we're on the brink of new changes, it can be tempting to wish away feelings of uncertainty, lack of clarity, and the overall sense of challenge that comes from not having all the answers. Accepting that uncertainty is part of the process and even embracing some of the adventures it brings doesn't eliminate stress and discomfort. However, it helps us see that we're on a normal, natural part of the human experience—growing, evolving, and changing through different seasons of life.

If you find yourself facing uncertainty as you look ahead to life changes you'd like to make, honor the feelings that come up as you explore that uncertainty. Consider perspectives that help you move forward and don't keep you from pursuing the changes you want in your life.

When we accept that uncertainty is a given, we can approach new beginnings with an open heart and mind, ready to learn, adapt, and grow. Remember, you don't need all the answers to start; You just need the courage to take the first step.